The first time I had ever held my baby was the first time I had ever held a baby.
I was so excited about becoming a mother. I had dreamt of it since I was a little girl.
As the day neared, I also became more and more nervous. I knew nothing about babies. I was going to be responsible for another human being who was going to look at me for everything. Another human being who literally was putting his life in my hands.
Everyone kept telling me that as soon as he was born my motherly instincts would kick in. That thought always made me feel better.
Finally, the day came. My son was born. The nurses put him in my arms. He was amazing and perfect.
I on the other hand, didn’t suddenly know what to do.
Here are 5 things I have learned and wish I knew as a new mom.
Be Kind to Yourself
It’s really easy to focus on what you think you are doing wrong or failing at as a mom. But that shouldn’t be the case. As moms, we are all learning every day. You will get better. You will learn more about your child and you will learn more about yourself in your new role as a mother every day. I used to tell my son that he had never been a baby before and I had never been the mother to a baby before but we were going to figure it out. And we did. He’s now 13 months and a toddler. And together we are figuring it out again. He’s happy and he’s healthy and we both survived all the mistakes I made and continue to make.
The other and maybe most important thing I have learned in the last 13 months is that all moms are just trying to figure it out. No matter how put together the mom at work looks, or how well dressed the mom at the store appears, we are all in the same boat. Every child, every mother and every family are different and we are learning and striving to be better every day.
Take As Many Pictures As You Can
Of course you want to take pictures of all the major milestones like birthdays, family celebrations and losing first tooth. But also take pictures of all the small firsts too like first time in a car seat, leaving the hospital and first time meeting the family pet. Also remember to take pictures just because you want to. Babies grow so fast. Take as many pictures of him doing everyday things or just because he is cute. One day he’ll grow up, sooner than you think, and you will be forever grateful that you took so many pictures.
It’s Okay to Do Nothing
One day your baby will grow up and someone is going to ask him what he remembers about his childhood. He’s not going to remember that there was laundry that wasn’t done or that the floor wasn’t mopped. He is going to remember that his mom played with him, laughed with him and spent time with him. It may look like and feel like you didn’t do anything all day but any day spent with your child is not wasted. It is a day making memories.
Ask for Help
It’s okay to not know everything and it’s definitely okay to ask for help. I read parenting books, joined mommy Facebook groups and ask my friends who are moms as many questions as I can. I have found in the last year, that they often disagree. Most questions don’t have a right or wrong answer. This was very overwhelming for me in the beginning. Now I am grateful to hear the different opinions so that when I decide what is best for my son and my family I am as informed as I can be.
Make Sure to Spend Time Outside Everyday
Spending time outside has so many benefits for you and your baby. It is really easy to not leave the house for days when you have a newborn. You may start to feel restless, depressed or get cabin fever if you do not leave the house for days. The more often you leave the house with your baby the easier it will get for you and for your baby.
